What Is Shadow Work In Spirituality?
Updated 2024.11.12
The meaning of spiritual shadow work. What is shadow work? How do you perform shadow work? How do I find my shadow self? In this post I answer these questions -
What does it mean to do shadow work?
Shadow work, spiritually speaking, is the process of looking at and integrating your perceived dark side, the part of yourself that you or others reject or see as “bad.”
The most challenging aspect in shadow work is the starting point - identifying your shadow so you know what it is, and because of that, we’ll discuss this first.
The benefit of identifying your shadow side is that once you know what your most prominent shadow aspect is, then you can begin to work on accepting this side of you, loving it, saying kind things to it, and seeing its strengths - this is the integration of the shadow, the shadow work.
Once you do this shadow work, spiritually speaking, then, you are on the path to ultimate self love, also known as unconditional self love, and you attain the ability to accept and love yourself in any and all situations.
This is a spiritual prize of shadow work and the purpose of it.
As once you unconditionally love yourself, you can extend this to others, and when you and others feel accepted, usually all in your life are happier and more peaceful. When people feel accepted and have no fear of losing love, then peace is known.
So shadow work provides the gateway for unconditional self love, which then brings peace and both of these are the reason why it matters and can be a valuable spiritual healing tool for personal growth.
Sounds interesting? Then let's begin shadow work now with identifying your most prominent shadow side.
Do not worry, it’s not painful at all.
Also, before beginning, note that everyone has a rejected self when they begin this work, even me, which I’ll discuss in my examples below. In that sense, we are one and the same.
Scroll down to start shadow work, and in the process, I’ll answer more common questions about it:
How to do shadow work for beginners
1 - Identify your shadow
How do you identify your shadow? This is step 1 in shadow work.
Shadow work involves choosing just one aspect of the rejected self to begin, and then embracing it through positive self talk, self love and acknowledging it in meditation.
To identify your shadow, you can look for it in three places:
Meditation. In meditation, the shadow can appear as a soul fragment, a hologram representing a part of you that was lost. Some people see it as an inner child, or small child version of themselves.
Dreams. It can also appear in dreams, arising as frequent dreams of unresolved situations from your past that really are resolved. If you have repeating dreams of the past, it could be a sign of where and when your shadow self was rejected and what aspect it takes.
Characteristics you’re sensitive about. Finally, shadows are created when someone external to you criticizes some part of you and rejects it. Then, you reject it. What aspect of your personality are you criticized on the most?
Three ways you identify your shadow are by: looking at when your mind sees yourself as bad, what side does it show, noticing what aspect of you is showing up rejected or as unresolved past in dreams, or recalling what aspect of you has been criticized by others the most.
Using number 3 as the example above, for me, I will say that it has been being called too sensitive; others have called this a flaw. This sensitive self is then, technically, my shadow.
Over to you, what is a trait others have said you are “too” much in? Or “too” little in? Is there a part of yourself you have perceived as bad in the past? A part of you that you try to pretend isn’t there?
Once you have it… let’s go to the next step.
2 - Embrace your shadow
How do you embrace your shadow? This is the second part of the shadow work, and the part that is the work.
In my prior example, until I embrace my sensitivity, by recognizing the strengths of my sensitivity, I will see this side of myself as bad, and push it down and away, resulting in negative love behaviors.
Negative love behaviors include negative self-talk, victim beliefs, or even projecting my shadow onto others, by calling them too sensitive.
To embrace your shadow:
Self Compassion and forgiveness. If you have negatively talked about your shadow even internally to yourself, hated upon it, or even projected on to others, the first part of the embracing work is to forgive yourself and others, by saying internally, to yourself:
“Thank you self for helping me identify what part of me needs more love and recognition. Thank you for sending others my way that helped me identify this aspect too. The past is the past. All is love.”
It may help to visualize the others who may have been involved in creating a shadow, or rejected side, in front of you, as you say these words.
Acknowledge where in life it is an asset. Embrace your shadow, by acknowledging ways in which your shadow is an asset.
Reword the shadow to something more positive if needed to begin. Instead of “too sensitive,” you might call the too sensitive shadow self an “acutely perceptive” or “finely attuned energy.” Then, notice where it has value. Using my example, being acutely perceptive is a strength when I work as a clairvoyant medium, and my clients pay me for it to help them solve problems.
It is an asset because having a finely attuned energy brings me income, and it brings others answers. It allows me to provide for myself and family and offers others peace of mind and definitive clarifications in the decision making process. These are positives.
In another example, say someone calls you “too critical.”You could embrace this by rewording it as “detailed-oriented” or “having refined tastes,” then think about areas of life where detail-orientedness is a valued skill, like in accounting or bookkeeping. This is just an example.
3 - Apply your shadow
Integrate this aspect by using this aspect whenever you are doing an activity where it is valued is the key way of integrating the shadow, so this aspect of self feels loved, appreciated and respected.
Usually, the shadow is just an unintegrated skill or strength that has yet to be applied in the right way. When you find out where your shadow is valued, then you can realize your shadow’s gifts.
Every shadow has a gift, or a place where it is helpful otherwise it wouldn’t exist in you or at all, per evolution.
For my example, if someone says you’re too much of a perfectionist; use your attention to fine detail excelling in a trade where tiny details matter.
Using the example above, you can apply your shadow like this:
Before starting a task where this aspect is valued, saying internally, for example, “Detail oriented self, I need all your attention with me today. Thank you for helping me succeed.”
To recap, the basics of shadow work
It’s a process of identifying and embracing your rejected self to reach ultimate self love
You do shadow work by identifying an aspect of self that has been criticized, by you or others, and then seeing its strengths
Seal the work by applying your shadow self to places in life where it is seen as a value or skill
Finally, seal your shadow work by continuing to see it as a valuable part of yourself regardless of any shifting societal views.
When you complete this shadow work, identify it and embrace it, even just mentally. Try to always remember to call forward your shadow at times and in circumstances when that aspect in you could be regarded as a strength.
Then, if anytime someone attempts to hook your post-unintegrated, wounded shadow in the future, by criticizing it, even if it’s you, internally say,
“Thank you for reminding me this is a strength of mine and that I can apply it helpfully whenever I need.”
Then, do not take the comments as an insult.
Even if someone calls out your newly embraced strength in a tone that suggests it may be one, remember people do not always use the right tone even when they mean to.
They act out unconscious patterns, too.
Further, when you do shadow work, you are now practicing unconditional self-love, which is then turned outward into unconditional love.
Meaning when shadow work is done, you accept when someone still hasn’t accepted their own dark side or is “acting out” of it, and you allow that to be okay.
You have found peace, and that’s all that matters. You don’t take on any other person’s shadows as negative, because you know they can be assets when applied elsewhere.
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